Back to School...Now that's Entertainment!

TEXT MAGAZINE COVER ASSIGNMENT

Yesterday was "Back to School" day for me. I never did get around to getting a new back pack, though I really do need one. Last semester I used one Carly had in high school. The strap was broken so I carried it with two hands clasped around the bottom directly in front of me. When I had art projects it was a little trickier. So anyway I got to go back to school. In my Photoshop class I was so entertained with the introductions that each person made about themselves. Some, though not meant to be funny, made me want to laugh out loud. As we went around the room I began preparing, in my mind, my quick intro. I am a back row person so I had some time to think about what I might contribute. I began to be so engrossed in some of their intros I quit thinking about mine.

Lady in front row. Around fifty-ish.
" I am a hairdresser and I want to be a photographer, so I quit hair and bought a camera."

Girl in front row;
"I am a photographer though I don't make much money at it since everyone wants you to do pictures for free." (I never understand this. If I was a chef would you come into my restaurant and ask for a free meal?)

Second row, seat one; she ate Doritos off and on for the nearly 5 hours we were in class.

"I came back to school 2 years ago to get my associates in fine arts but the math made me sick so I switched to associates of applied sciences since it has no math in it."
( I have to admit that this was something I wrote down for myself. I hate math!)
On and on she goes about how she lost 10 lbs because the computer courses made her seriously stressed out. She admitted that she has a fear of computers and that she drank heavily some mornings before class to relax. She went over and over her disdain for internships that go to the young kids and how offensive it is that companies don't always pay their interns.She will NOT work for free! She listed off places that want interns but won't pay. I wrote down some of them for the hope of....EXPERIENCE!

Second row seat two; This one was my favorite and I wanted to giggle so bad.
I can't even begin to write exactly what she said but this is the gist of what she was saying in quick bullet points.

* She went to Harvard
* She is really smart
* She has worked for very successful people
* She went to Harvard
* She is usually getting her work published or someone is begging to display her work in a show.
* She traveled Europe while attending, did she mention HARVARD! and took pictures of everything in Europe that was beautiful and significant.
* She has no genuine love or deep feelings for babies or small children.
* She most likely is going to THE LOCAL COMMUNITY COLLEGE just as a means to getting her second masters.
And just as we all thought she was done a second round of "It's all about me" began with the word "Harvard" intermingled.

My turn came and IF I could have done it with a straight face I might have thrown in some of the deep south hick accent I can imitate thanks to my old friend Sadie Middleton.
I BEGAN-
"Since I have been married to the same guy for 24 years, given birth to five children
(this would have been a good time to start showin'pictures of all my babies to "Harvard")
I don't think anything stresses me out and nothing about a computer will make me lose weight or make me drink heavily."
Everyone laughed except "Sister Harvard". She doesn't like me already I can feel it but I will make sure she becomes a friend...This semester is gonna be fun!