Status Quo wasn't Good Enough

If you know me at all, you know I like to play. I wouldn't say that I was immature but serious, stuffy and proper people make me want to behave all the worse. Life should be about belly laughs with the wrinkles around your eyes to prove you've been laughin'.

Last week before my surgery I turned a bit silent with very little laughter  and honestly struggled with a bad case of the grumpies. As much as I wanted the ordeal of my latest health problems to be over I was freaked out at the idea of surgery. I guess I had grown accustomed to my pains, my inability to leave the house and my serious lack of energy. The unknown was too scary for me.
I know my mom sensed I needed an added measure of peace when she asked if I wanted to go to the temple with her. I know my dad knew I was freaked out when he called to console, uplift and encourage me to see all the blessings of modern medicine. I know my family sensed my fear when they all spread from me when I walked into the room...there were just too many eggshells on the ground around me.

Now several days after the surgery I am so grateful!!! The surgeon found severe endometreosis, which was totally unknown, and my long term health was at risk. My dad had encouraged me to ask my surgeon if he had had a prayer that day and Dr. Jewel graciously offered to say one with my entire surgical team present in the room. He said a wonderful prayer and in retrospect, I am so glad that he did once the surgery started and under the more serious circumstances he found himself in once the complications were realized.

I have learned to trust and how to find ways to move forward with faith. It was a good practice run and one I hope I can learn from the next time fear hits me and I feel like the status quo is good enough...cause it's not...there's something better out there.